Macbeth journal #7

After all I have come through, the murders, the secrets and the dishonesty, I have almost forgotten how it feels like to be scared of something.  What am I afraid of?  There is a whole army coming against me to kill me at their own will and am I afraid?  No, I have lost all feeling of that.  Ah, I hear a shriek!  What?  My... my wife is dead?    <Sobs> Why did she have to leave me at such an early age?  Why could't she wait for me?  Who am I?  What am I doing?  I am lost.  Without my beloved Lady Macbeth, life is meaningless now.  Without her, I have no drive to accomplish what I have done, yet alone, continue on in life anymore.